Fall is back in Boulder, CO (also presumably everywhere else) and if my Facebook and Twitter feeds are any indication, the regional population couldn’t be happier. So I suppose you have come here to read what just about every other blog is writing about: favorite fall activities, favorite fall drinks, favorite fall fashion, etc… If this is the case, I’d suggest heading to one of those. As my general feelings on fall can be summed thusly: As is well known to my longtime reader(s), I love the Summer. I love the sunlight, long hours, warm weather and trips that are synonymous with those glorious 4 months. So when I read twitter statuses that say “So excited to wear scarves again!!!” Part(most) of me dies inside. Don’t you people realize you have like 8 months of scarf weather!? It's not that I don't love the Fall - I actually do. Open windows at night. Colored leaves. Cooking with pumpkin in anything is accepted. It's the fact that I know what is next...a few short weeks away...that causes me grief.
I try to be of the opinion that as long as Fall is here, we may as well embrace it. But this position is anathema to me. Summer, in many ways, is like my best friend. I look forward to it before it arrives, can’t get enough of it when it is finally here and I am terribly sad when it leaves. Fall is Summer’s murderer/rapist. But unlike typical murder-rapists, I am then forced to hang out with the thing that forcibly sodomized and stabbed my best friend. Then I have to hear about what a great guy he is by literally everyone I am associated with! Look, he may have some good jokes and can turn the occasional phrase, but at the end of the day he still left my beloved Summer in a dumpster behind KFC.
It is because of this that I will be curmudgeonly during any and all fall activities I am forced to participate in. Yes apple picking and Halloween may be fun, but they can’t replace my best friend.
P.S. Not to clog my inbox about the Fall vs. Summer argument again, but I have one question for the Summer haters. When you go on vacation, do you go somewhere that is 60 degrees and overcast? No, you go somewhere that looks like this: