A reload from last year. Still a story that makes me giggle. Something tells me we all need a laugh today...
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I wasn't going to put this out there for public consumption. Sometimes these little nuggets are best kept among a small circle of friends. But a few friends who I told were all like, "You gotta put this one on your blog!!"
Ummmm... ok...
A few weeks ago my good friend from Atlanta, Patrick, was in town visiting his CU son, Kevin. We trolled (yes) on over to The Dark Horse CU bar for dinner (eugh?), which was a dark, hollowed out canyon saloon which reeked of bad beer and stale puke. (Good memories of college days came flooding back!) We all sat in the bar area to eat - the usual scenario where you strike up conversations with those around you. I ended up in some flirtacious banter with a CU Rugby Sophomore .... c'mon, let Sharpie have a little fun ....... Homeboy most certainly did NOT look 20 - he did look young though - but then I don't look 25 either! (Ahem!) Patrick and Kevin were eavesdropping on our conversation the whole time .... I would occasionally look over and wink at them as they were laughing and shaking their heads at me.
By the end of my burger and 50-cent Monday-Night-Ladies-Night-Beer-Pitcher-Special, my little friend was warm for my form. I get invited back to his "dorm". (Oh, the memories!) Romantic and compelling offer, for sure, but I'm thinking probably not. (Understood we're talking a 20 year old male in college - dude would have taken home anything with a PULSE - this bears no compliment to me. But at least the offer was when he was sober. Beer goggles were not involved. *score!*)
Homeboy was all about the wooing. Demonstrating his mastery of the art of seduction, he skillfully tosses out the "you're hot" descriptor. Damn right I'm hot, little boy. And it only requires one roll of duct tape to keep these boobs up too.
Alas, I had to turn him down with the reality check. Cougar / Mrs Robinson aside, he's got to at least be able to legally rent a car. I have standards.
Carole: "Honey, I am old enough to be your mother..."
Here comes the comeback of the century. Ready?
Little Friend: "Good - then it will be familiar to you."
Ummmmmmmmm... HUH?? Clever comeback --- but EUGH????!!!!!!!! I can't even describe the look of confusion plus utter gross-out that I shot him.
I thought about following up with something about "spotting due to premenopause" (gotta teach the young lad a thing or two!) but thought I'd just leave it alone...
Throughout this evening I'd been texting my good friends, Anthony and Michele Beeson, about the scene. Michele sent me a great text: "Embrace it. You're hot. Rugby hunk wants you!"
Ha!
I've still got it. ;)
4 comments:
I am entertained and in awe at this HAHA!
However, this post just goes to show how evil women are. You just love toying w/ us feeble minded men and building us up and stroking our ... ... ego haha and then CRUSHING US!
Not fair cougar... just not fair.
I remember this one....one of my favs!
This story still makes me tear up from laughing so hard! I'm pretty sure, 'Come back with me to my dorm', really sounds like, 'I have no game but maybe you'd be interested in making out with me in my bunk beds while my roommate plays HALO sitting above us'. ...amateur... ;)
That was one of my favorites too! :)
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