What a week this has been. I feel as though I am making NO progress physically. (Yet I know I must be...)
Extra special thanks to my friend and sports chiropractor extraordinare, Josh Glass, for his extra attention this week. As it turns out, I don't know what I would have done without him.
Aside from lots of glute strength work, I'd been doing very little, just the usual routine. 30:00-40:00 runs, 30:00 swims, 1 hour+ bikes, etc. Each activity has caused the same "hunched over", painful reaction. Wednesday, in particular, I rode for 90min with my friend Tony Myers and when I dismounted the indoor trainer, I couldn't stand straight. Same thing for the swimming (I think this is either pushing off the wall or the twisting which results from flip turns?). The running simply aches.
I am beyond frustrated.
I'd been helping Josh at his office this week and it was a good thing! He worked on me each day and I am so grateful for that. He was able to monitor my progress (or lack thereof) post activity and treatment each day. Josh told me my SI joint gets totally locked up, and my lower back just won't budge... my back is just insanely inflamed. Thankfully I seem to be holding the adjustments, so that is good news.
I'll be seeing Josh again next week but the next step seems to be an anti-inflammatory injection. Anyone who knows me knows of my needle-phobia, so this ought to be good!
I'll keep you posted.
December 21, 2007
December 10, 2007
The view from behind
This weekend showed glorious weather to Atlanta. We had sub-70 degree days here - amazing. 40 degrees one day, 70 the next. Crazy.
This month of December is "strengthen and rebuild" focus only. Any work I do to try to rebuild fitness will only backfire if my muscles are not strong enough to absorb the work. The crash aside, the problems I was facing this season with my back (that came to a head while I was training in Boulder in September) are still there. I haven't escaped the need to address them. JZ has been such an awesome support system for me with this... after the Olympics she went through near career-ending issues with her back. Watching me all hunched over after dismounting the bike each day was eerily familiar to her; the advice she has been giving me has been its usual bulls-eye accuracy. She's advising me the same protocol she herself went through post-Sydney when she came back to race stronger than ever.
Regardless if I ever race again, my back issues (things not related to bike crash) have definitely creeped into hindering my every day living. The advice I am following is definitely to help me regain movement simply for living first.
Sunday (yesterday) I decided to try to ride with a few of the athletes I coach in town. I'm only supposed to be riding a max of 1 hour, but decided I would try to ride longer if I felt ok. Since I've been doing a lot of work trying to strengthen my glutes I wanted to see how my back felt at this point after riding.
It was great to start out with Andy, Kristy, Amy and Alberto. Andy had some faster-paced work on his schedule, so soon enough he was peeling on ahead - I decided to try to sit on his wheel for a bit. I definitely felt out of shape, but I was surprised by how well I was able to ride. Granted, I was sucking the guy's wheel and I only rode with him for 30:00 at that intensity (felt like 1/2 IM effort to me), but it was nice that my body just sort of fell back into habit. It knew what to do.
Soon enough Andy peeled on ahead and I went back for the others to ride for a bit with them. I rode for 2-hours and was happy with that. My back ached like a Buick was driving through it, but pain I can tolerate. When I dismounted I noted a definite improvement in my normal back related pain. It's still there, but seemed better.
I later got in the pool before the swim clinic Tim Storsteen and I were doing, and tried to gut out some 100's on 1:30. I was actually able to hit a few of these, so that was good, but mostly my current pace seems to hover around 1:40-1:45. Eeek. It's amazing to me how much slower I am, how much my broken body has affected my form and feel for the water. I feel completely different as a swimmer. I have lost flexibility in my torso, too, and flip turns are stabbing, but I know it will come back; it really is amazing to me how different it all is.
I woke up this morning SORE from a 2-hour fairly easy ride, and a 2000 swim. Good GRIEF!! I'm headed to the gym now for glute work and a 20:00 run.
If nothing else, in a few months I hope I am at least looking better from behind.... :) Yeah, baby!
This month of December is "strengthen and rebuild" focus only. Any work I do to try to rebuild fitness will only backfire if my muscles are not strong enough to absorb the work. The crash aside, the problems I was facing this season with my back (that came to a head while I was training in Boulder in September) are still there. I haven't escaped the need to address them. JZ has been such an awesome support system for me with this... after the Olympics she went through near career-ending issues with her back. Watching me all hunched over after dismounting the bike each day was eerily familiar to her; the advice she has been giving me has been its usual bulls-eye accuracy. She's advising me the same protocol she herself went through post-Sydney when she came back to race stronger than ever.
Regardless if I ever race again, my back issues (things not related to bike crash) have definitely creeped into hindering my every day living. The advice I am following is definitely to help me regain movement simply for living first.
Sunday (yesterday) I decided to try to ride with a few of the athletes I coach in town. I'm only supposed to be riding a max of 1 hour, but decided I would try to ride longer if I felt ok. Since I've been doing a lot of work trying to strengthen my glutes I wanted to see how my back felt at this point after riding.
It was great to start out with Andy, Kristy, Amy and Alberto. Andy had some faster-paced work on his schedule, so soon enough he was peeling on ahead - I decided to try to sit on his wheel for a bit. I definitely felt out of shape, but I was surprised by how well I was able to ride. Granted, I was sucking the guy's wheel and I only rode with him for 30:00 at that intensity (felt like 1/2 IM effort to me), but it was nice that my body just sort of fell back into habit. It knew what to do.
Soon enough Andy peeled on ahead and I went back for the others to ride for a bit with them. I rode for 2-hours and was happy with that. My back ached like a Buick was driving through it, but pain I can tolerate. When I dismounted I noted a definite improvement in my normal back related pain. It's still there, but seemed better.
I later got in the pool before the swim clinic Tim Storsteen and I were doing, and tried to gut out some 100's on 1:30. I was actually able to hit a few of these, so that was good, but mostly my current pace seems to hover around 1:40-1:45. Eeek. It's amazing to me how much slower I am, how much my broken body has affected my form and feel for the water. I feel completely different as a swimmer. I have lost flexibility in my torso, too, and flip turns are stabbing, but I know it will come back; it really is amazing to me how different it all is.
I woke up this morning SORE from a 2-hour fairly easy ride, and a 2000 swim. Good GRIEF!! I'm headed to the gym now for glute work and a 20:00 run.
If nothing else, in a few months I hope I am at least looking better from behind.... :) Yeah, baby!
December 6, 2007
Some 'REAL' updates...
December Greetings!
I do have some things to share for this update. I didn't want to say anything before I knew what was up, and confided in a handful of my close, inner-circle friends as to what was going on in case their help was needed urgently. I love and thank those of you dear friends told as I obviously chose the right people in whom to confide - not a word of this got out, for which I am grateful. I know the people in my world I can trust and I will remember this always.
One of the things that came about as a result of the accident in Hawaii was some attention to my kidney. A cat-scan had shown something that initially I was told was a bruise. Amid all the other broken this's and cracked that's, a bruised kidney was just added to the list.
Once I got back to Atlanta I was fortunate to get my broken wrists looked after by Sports Ortho Dr Michael Behr, my friend from masters swimming. He was awesome! Thank you, Mike! Then, my good friend Dana connected me to her friend to monitor the rest of my injuries, neurosurgeon extraordinaire, Dan Moore. Over the course of several weeks, tests were taken to simply monitor my progress in healing. One of the things noted from an MRI was an 'abnormality' in my kidney. He listed several things it could be... a cyst, an ulcer, blood in the kidney ... but it also could be a tumor.
Zoinks. Wasn't expecting that one.
I am not one to rush to paranoid or even negative conclusions very easily. I am a fairly rational person... but, as anyone who has cancer in their family can probably relate to, I was ready to hear it was a tumor. Now - even a tumor didn't mean malignant, but I was preparing myself to hear: Cancer. I wasn't particularily upset, actually. That may sound absurd or easy to say after-the-fact, but I really was ok. Perhaps if I had children I would have felt differently, but as it's just me in this little world, I really was surprisingly unaffected. I just wanted to know what was going on so I could launch my action plan. The following day a lovely bouquet of flowers arrived from Monica and Gordo. They had no idea what was going on other than the accident so the timing of this made me smile.
Dr. Moore wanted another opinion so he sent the film to his colleague, a radiologist. The radiologist agreed that something was abnormal, and both suggested further tests, which I did.
All of this took several weeks with communication, test scheduling and results discussed - and the bulk began going on right around the time of Ironman Florida (a month ago). This was a lot to have swirling in my head and with few people knowing .... well, it provided a lot of "soul" discussions with myself. I didn't know what was about to go down potentially ... and this is why I went to Ironman Florida this year as a spectator. The pain of an unhealed body and not racing what I had planned all year for didn't phase me - if I was about to head into a world of biopsy's and chemotherapy and who-knows-what, there were people I wanted to see before this happened. Somehow my perspective changed.
So - writing that I wanted to go to see some of those I loved had more meaning, to me, than most people realized. Pondering your own mortality has a way of prioritizing and focusing one's true objectives. It was amazing to me how little I cared about people who had hurt me and how much I just wanted to be around people I loved, silently treasuring each moment with them.
I hope to carry this spirit with me going forward. I'm reminded of how wasteful time is when it's spent on things or people who have little positive impact on your life.
For several weeks I walked around in a world of unknown. I bugged the crap out of my best friend Brian, an emergency room doctor in NYC. Poor guy was pulling down 100+hour weeks with no sleep but I would leave message after message on his phone asking if I should be feeling this or that, what was ok to do, etc. Finally he had lost his patience with me and barked, "Sharpie, I love you, but I have no f'ing idea. I haven't seen any of the tests or x-rays. I am not going to give you a medical diagnosis or prescribe acceptable activity when I have no clue what's going on. Trust the doctors who are seeing you and when you know something for sure, then I can help.." He was right (as usual), and he is an excellent doctor not to go playing fast-and-loose with a potentially serious medical situation.
It has been 6-weeks and all seems to be fine. No tumor and no cancer.. "yet", as my cousin reminds. I am moving forward with physical rehab and getting back to moving strongly and am up to 45:00 of slow running, 2000 in the pool and indoor cycling rides. I thought about including some thoughts I had written in my private journal; what one thinks about (and cares about) when faced with a situation that could be totally fine or could be life-threatening... that really was a most bizarre paradox... but some of those things seem a bit too deep for a journal on an athletic site. :) I may change my mind. But in moving forward, I once again thank you for the tremendous support and loving words extended to me. At one point things were a bit serious and I appreciated so many of you, in ways you couldn't begin to know.
Take care of your life, your body and who you are. Moments and time wasted on things that don't matter are just that - wasted. Hold your head high, smile and rise above. The good stuff always shines when it matters... :)
Thanks for reading my journal.
C.
I do have some things to share for this update. I didn't want to say anything before I knew what was up, and confided in a handful of my close, inner-circle friends as to what was going on in case their help was needed urgently. I love and thank those of you dear friends told as I obviously chose the right people in whom to confide - not a word of this got out, for which I am grateful. I know the people in my world I can trust and I will remember this always.
One of the things that came about as a result of the accident in Hawaii was some attention to my kidney. A cat-scan had shown something that initially I was told was a bruise. Amid all the other broken this's and cracked that's, a bruised kidney was just added to the list.
Once I got back to Atlanta I was fortunate to get my broken wrists looked after by Sports Ortho Dr Michael Behr, my friend from masters swimming. He was awesome! Thank you, Mike! Then, my good friend Dana connected me to her friend to monitor the rest of my injuries, neurosurgeon extraordinaire, Dan Moore. Over the course of several weeks, tests were taken to simply monitor my progress in healing. One of the things noted from an MRI was an 'abnormality' in my kidney. He listed several things it could be... a cyst, an ulcer, blood in the kidney ... but it also could be a tumor.
Zoinks. Wasn't expecting that one.
I am not one to rush to paranoid or even negative conclusions very easily. I am a fairly rational person... but, as anyone who has cancer in their family can probably relate to, I was ready to hear it was a tumor. Now - even a tumor didn't mean malignant, but I was preparing myself to hear: Cancer. I wasn't particularily upset, actually. That may sound absurd or easy to say after-the-fact, but I really was ok. Perhaps if I had children I would have felt differently, but as it's just me in this little world, I really was surprisingly unaffected. I just wanted to know what was going on so I could launch my action plan. The following day a lovely bouquet of flowers arrived from Monica and Gordo. They had no idea what was going on other than the accident so the timing of this made me smile.
Dr. Moore wanted another opinion so he sent the film to his colleague, a radiologist. The radiologist agreed that something was abnormal, and both suggested further tests, which I did.
All of this took several weeks with communication, test scheduling and results discussed - and the bulk began going on right around the time of Ironman Florida (a month ago). This was a lot to have swirling in my head and with few people knowing .... well, it provided a lot of "soul" discussions with myself. I didn't know what was about to go down potentially ... and this is why I went to Ironman Florida this year as a spectator. The pain of an unhealed body and not racing what I had planned all year for didn't phase me - if I was about to head into a world of biopsy's and chemotherapy and who-knows-what, there were people I wanted to see before this happened. Somehow my perspective changed.
So - writing that I wanted to go to see some of those I loved had more meaning, to me, than most people realized. Pondering your own mortality has a way of prioritizing and focusing one's true objectives. It was amazing to me how little I cared about people who had hurt me and how much I just wanted to be around people I loved, silently treasuring each moment with them.
I hope to carry this spirit with me going forward. I'm reminded of how wasteful time is when it's spent on things or people who have little positive impact on your life.
For several weeks I walked around in a world of unknown. I bugged the crap out of my best friend Brian, an emergency room doctor in NYC. Poor guy was pulling down 100+hour weeks with no sleep but I would leave message after message on his phone asking if I should be feeling this or that, what was ok to do, etc. Finally he had lost his patience with me and barked, "Sharpie, I love you, but I have no f'ing idea. I haven't seen any of the tests or x-rays. I am not going to give you a medical diagnosis or prescribe acceptable activity when I have no clue what's going on. Trust the doctors who are seeing you and when you know something for sure, then I can help.." He was right (as usual), and he is an excellent doctor not to go playing fast-and-loose with a potentially serious medical situation.
It has been 6-weeks and all seems to be fine. No tumor and no cancer.. "yet", as my cousin reminds. I am moving forward with physical rehab and getting back to moving strongly and am up to 45:00 of slow running, 2000 in the pool and indoor cycling rides. I thought about including some thoughts I had written in my private journal; what one thinks about (and cares about) when faced with a situation that could be totally fine or could be life-threatening... that really was a most bizarre paradox... but some of those things seem a bit too deep for a journal on an athletic site. :) I may change my mind. But in moving forward, I once again thank you for the tremendous support and loving words extended to me. At one point things were a bit serious and I appreciated so many of you, in ways you couldn't begin to know.
Take care of your life, your body and who you are. Moments and time wasted on things that don't matter are just that - wasted. Hold your head high, smile and rise above. The good stuff always shines when it matters... :)
Thanks for reading my journal.
C.
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